Tuesday, 9 January 2007

Where is forward an who has the compass to this minefield

Whoa hold up....

" Emotional minefield ahead "

Why is there not a sign that says that somewhere when you get into anything that may or may nto involve feelings, relationships or anything other than just friends!

Now I'm not complaining at all, its just I can complicate things in my head in my own special way and don't need help doing so ;)

(for even the slightest inkling of what I'm blabbering about see previous posts)

So we had spoken all through the night on the phone she had gone straight to work, I had managed to squeeze in two hours sleep and we had got to the end of the day both with varying degrees of success ;)

A good friend of hers at work had noticed something was amiss she (from here on in B) had told her about our all night phone conversation (which i'm not sure didn't irk me but for what reason I am lost to other than I would have liked her to talk to me but understandably B needed an objective viewpoint ) The friend had some very positive things to say and some objective points to put across which got B to thinking well if we have had these feelings for all this time (11 Years we only recently realised it was mutual but are now struggling to work out if they are still as strong or phantom remnants of passions for memories of each other) Then is it a good idea to pursue and why have nt we acted on it the friend seems to think there is a piece of the puzzle missing, we are both perplexed!

This obviously got B thinking I mean we are both tired long night ! I enjoyed it and it really did clear some air but after the talk with the friend it has us both thinking which I'm never sure is a good thing she is erring towards all or nothing to test its strength where as I know she has used this method in the past to put a cap on a situation that she wasn't sure was meant to be and after so long I am not sure I am willing to risk pushing it to a conclusion to see if that is the answer I want to know I so want to know but I also don't want to lose what little thread of her I have !

Is this even making sense ?

I haven't uttered these thought s to anyone some of them not even to her which makes me feel somewhat guilty but I need to read them to make sense of them because in my head they are purely chatter !

I think I want to say HELP


Judy said...

Hi.. I'm visiting from Michele's and hope to come back and hang out a while, if I may. :-)

kenju said...

My advice would be to take it slowly.......very slowly.

Leanne said...

I'm with Kenju. You're still figuring out what's going on, just take it one day at a time until all of the pieces fit together. :)

Jingoistic said...

An interesting read. I think you need time to think.